The Middle Child

Out of my three teams, lately the Avs have become the forgotten middle child, with the Bruins being the delinquent oldest and the Oilers being the youngest in need of constant supervision. The Avs have played neither well enough nor poorly enough to get my attention, and their games have been at times when I'm more likely to miss them. That being said, there's no way I'm going to forget about them. I sympathize with them, being in the middle of two completely psychotic sisters myself. Tonight, I made sure that I gave them my undivided attention. It helped that their game started later than the Oilers (7:00) and Bruins (7:30), who had to fight for time, but with a 7-5 win over Calgary, it wasn't a game to be missed anyway.
For the convenience of browsers, I've sectioned off the games a bit.

The Avs
The Avs proved me wrong throughout the entire game, in good and annoying ways. For instance, before the game I noted that the Avs were the most consistent in the set of forwards they used every night. Just then the Altitude announcers informed me that Marek Svatos was a healthy scratch for the second night in a row, not only proving me wrong but also breaking my heart. I miss the real Marek Svatos. Later, I tried again and remarked that the Avs had the most stable line combinations (Sakic-Brunette-Wolski, Stastny-Hejduk-who cares, Arnason-McLean-Laperierre, the fourth). Brunette then scored a goal while Brad Richardson took Wojtek Wolski's place on their line. After that I realized that I had no idea what was going on in the game and should stop trying before I hurt myself. Peter Budaj was pulled for Jose Theodore after he let in four Calgary goals that weren't really his fault, but weren't completely impossible to save. The Avs had my luck working against them. As was pointed out during the game, Calgary scored most of their goals when the momentum was on Colorado's side, making them even more back-breaking. It was one of those extremely tiring games that's devastating to lose and exhilirating to win, and therefore really hard to talk about afterwards. I will say that the Avs forwards are an impressive bunch when they play to their potential. The Sakic-Brunette-Wolski tandem is consistently good, though Sakic would be consistently good if his linemates were PJ Stock and our pet rabbit Snickers. Though they're not nearly as prolific, I'm also a big fan of the third line, mostly because it hinges on Tyler Arnason. Lappy and McLean always do the best they can, meaning the line is only as good as Arnason is that night. Recently, it's been pretty good, because when he's working hard Arnason is really fun to watch.

The best foward of the night, however, was Milan Hejduk, who has played better than his numbers this year show. Milan owned this game, and not just because he had a hat trick. If you watch any one of his goals, you can see that he was a step ahead of the game all night long. It was clearest on his second goal, where he banked the shot in off of Kiprusoff from behind the goal line. It appeared to be a lucky bounce, but when they replayed the goal in slow motion, I saw Milan pick up his head, see where Kiprusoff was, and shoot it at exactly the angle to bounce in. They played it again at regular speed and, like before, it just seemed lucky. Milan was seeing the game in slow motion, which is why he was able to score on 3 of his team-high 9 shots. He's frequented the Avs' penalty killing squad, too, which in the beginning of the year weirded me out, but makes perfect sense after last night. Milan may be known for his fine-tuned offensive skills, but he's a very smart player who understands hockey well. How can it possibly be harder to notice the opposing de cheating for a one-timer than it is to notice Kiprusoff cheating off the post? That being said, the Avs have the 22nd best penalty kill in the league, making it hard to praise too much.
Strange dream from a few weeks ago that's vaguely relevant: I was at a party at my friend's house, and hooked up with this kid I know. Then Milan Hejduk showed up. I've never found him very attractive before, but all of a sudden I did. So I hooked up with him, too. I woke up and thought, "Wow, this is great! I finally find Milan Hejduk attractive! Wait...no. No, I still don't. Dang."

The Bruins
My three teams each had a different outcome, and of course the Bruins were the losers. Not having Patrice Bergeron in the lineup due to a typical late-season "lower-body injury" hurt the B's more than most people realized. Confident and surprisingly strong, Patrice is one of the better puck posession forwards that the Bruins have, and without him the rest of the team was throwing the puck around with no real plan. Savard did his best to step up his already stellar game, assisting on Murray's lone Bruins goal, but he doesn't play the same sort of game that Patrice does. With a little bit of space and a target (whether it be pass or shot), Savard is deadly, but he doesn't create space for himself as well as Patrice. He also could have been thrown off by the "line combinations", which ended up just being Boyes and him at center, with Bochenski, Murray, Axelsson, Kessel, Sturm, Tenkrat, and Chistov cycling on the wings. There were minor variations (occasionally Kessel at center, sometimes Donovan and Mowers would appear) but for the most part it was a steady stream of chaos. Things with the Bruins have gotten so bad that I don't even know what they're attempting to do anymore. Take the Sillinger goal, for instance, when he walked right in without a Bruin near him. He was actually so open that I couldn't tell which Bruin should have been responsible for him. Murray was in no man's land and appeared to be closest, but Mara was standing in front of Tim Thomas like the motionless pillar of ineptitude that he is and Chara was somewhere by the other faceoff dot, contemplating his escape route back to Slovakia. I give up.

The Oilers
For the Oilers to get only one point out of the Buffalo game sucked, but I can't argue too strongly that they definitely deserved another. They outplayed Buffalo for the most part, and especially early on, but the amount of legitimately good scoring chances had to be about equal. The Oilers would control play for a decent amount of time, then Buffalo would come down and get a point-blank chance, mostly denied by a very sharp Roli. After a few runs through this cycle I realized that Buffalo (mainly the Afinogenov-Vanek-Roy line) was having its way with both the fourth line and the scary de pairing of MAB and Greene. All night long the Sabres were busting through those two, eventually leading to the goal scored by Afinogenov (who, despite his awesome name, I'm starting to hate). The rest of the de, minus a few Hejda blunders, played surprisingly well, mostly because they were very agressive. They held the line, closed the gap in the neutral zone, and skated the puck deep on the few occasions when they could. One could argue that while the Sabres were flat to start out with, they were also held at bay early on by pretty good defense. Jason Smith in particular showed his worth in a game like this. He's not the best player by many measures, but to me there are no sweeter words than, "OUCH. Daniel Briere just got hammered by Smith! His pale, sickly-looking ass isn't getting up off the ice any time soon!" Maybe no announcer has said that exactly, but after that OT goal I have to keep hope. With most of the de doing their job, the Sabres were forced to score their only goals first on MAB/Greene, then on Toby Petersen. That's one potent Buffalo offense!

Then again, I'm just speaking out of bitter hatred. Like the Sabres, the Oilers only had one line really going for them- though they were REALLY going. Horc, Smytty, and Hemsky were so powerful that, save for the occasional "this line can be dangerous" muttering, they silenced the Buffalo announcers when they were on the ice. Considering the announcers, though, this might not be that great of a feat. These are the same guys who suggested that Edmonton really misses the veteran leadership of Sergei Samsonov. They kept making mistakes without any attempts at correcting themselves, almost as if they knew that no one in their audience would notice. A surefire giveaway that announcers are useless is if they pronounce names wrong. Very good announcers know how to pronounce most players' names out of familiarity, and I suspect that if they don't know then they make an effort to find out. Pronouncing Smid's name as it's spelled rather than "Schmeed" is understandable, as is (to a lesser extent) calling Pouliot "Poulio", but both could have been avoided with any sort of effort. In addition to a minor mispronounciation of the vowell-happy Staios, somehow Horc's name turned into "Horcrot". To give them credit, they moved closer to his actual name as the game went on (Horcrot, then Horcroft, then Horcroff), and if the game had only gone into a shootout, they just might've gotten there. This is a pointless rant, but an extreme pet peeve. For some reason, the most annoying thing an announcer can do is mispronounce names and call Jarret Stoll "Jarret Staal" for the whole game.

I guess one good thing about watching the opposition's station is that it's easier to analyze the game without bias. Jack Edwards and Andy Brickley, the Bruins' guys, are constantly worrying about placating the insane Boston fans. For the past two games they've done nothing but rabidly praise Ference out of fear that B's fans will tear his newly-added hide to pieces. If they were objective, they'd tell us that he hasn't played badly, but is a little nervous in his new city, which you can't fault him on. For the first few games he's rushed passes and looked a tiny bit twitchy. Wouldn't it be better to just acknowledge this and move on, rather than repeatedly pointing out what a beautiful skating stride he has? Better than either of the other options, the Avs' Altitude manages to capture how I'm feeling perfectly, mostly because the announcers seem to be what I am- in love with the team. They're ecstatic when the Avs score, despondent when they're scored on, and in awe of Joe Sakic. They understand the significance of certain players scoring or playing well. In some strange way, it's like watching the game with friends. This is the something like the newfound familiarity I feel with Ladislav Smid, but not nearly as creepy.

Quick notes

• Zach Stortini looks like a dirty hobo that you'd be afraid to walk by on the street for fear of contracting diseases, but somehow his proud, toothless grin after the fight was adorably endearing. Somehow.
  
• Raffi played a terrible game. He wasn't skating at all. Even the Buffalo announcers picked up on it when he made a beautiful breakout pass to Daniel Briere. You could see MacT complimenting it on the bench. I think the Oilers need to hire someone to follow Raffi around and piss him off so he plays with a little more anger. His linemates, Pouliot and Thoreson, would agree, though it would end up being costly for Edmonton as these "Raffi Provokers" would need pretty frequent replacement (and medical benefits).
  
• Despite this fact not being mentioned by my buddies at Altitude, J-M Liles had one shift in the third period and just over eight minutes of ice time overall. Why do I keep looking these things up?
  
• After way too much thought, I've figured out that the NHL equivalent of me is Brett Clark. This is pretty objective and fair, seeing as I've pegged other teammates of mine as J-M Liles, Rob Blake, and Peter Forsberg. And yes, my entire team has played for the Avs at one point in their career. It's great. We even have a Dan Hinote.
• Looking back, I'm not sure I really would have murdered my English teacher. Then again, I'm not sure that I wouldn't have. But I took the last post down anyway. Summary (factually altered for length): I skipped a class. Instead of giving me a cut card, my English teacher tried to keep me from playing in the last game of the season, but failed. Before he failed I swore I would kill him, and was serious. For the record, even though I skipped half a day of school and got myself in a ton of trouble, my parents are completely on my side and my dad also swore to kill Skinder.
  
• "Kill Skinder" would make a great movie title, especially if that movie were a documentary.
  
• I'm pretty sure I don't come off this bitter in person.